Bread?

So I tried to make bread yesterday! I was so excited about it. I ground my own wheat into flour and everything. A family that I work with through the school I work for gave me what they called the easiest bread recipe ever. Apparently it is full proof you make the whole recipe in the blender and just put it in the bread pan to cook. There is apparently NO way to mess it up. I was REALLY looking forward to hot warm bread. What I created was in fact NOT bread. I am not sure if a giant wheat glob actually has a name bread pudding perhaps, but it was NOT bread. I kept hoping that some miracle would take place that it would change in the oven and somehow turn into bread. I am pretty sure the issue was that it didn't rise right but for the life of me I have know clue what went wrong. I am really not a domestic hands on type of person. It was not what I was made for. I would have died on the plains for sure.
I have told Darin for years that I am in fact not meant for domestic work. He doesn't quite believe me. I can not tell you the number of times I have hurt myself cooking or cleaning. I can't go a week without bruising, burning or cutting myself in an attempt to be domestic. I swear I am going against nature when I try to cook and clean at all. Nine years ago I was trying to clean my car by hand. I cut my finger on the tail pipe of the car and ended up with a permanent tattoo on my finger. I have a 1/4 inch black line on my right pinkie that will never go away ( I couldn't get the grease out of the cut). I deiced at that point that god was trying to tell me that I was not meant for manual labor. That the tattoo is in fact a reminder from the Divine that I should not even attempt manual labor. I agree, but since I can not afford to pay anyone else to do it. I make due.
Until recently my children thought that cookies came out of freezer or refrigerator packages. I know that they will eventually make cookies at a friends house and be confused when the person breaks out flour and sugar. More recently I have started using Betty Crockers bagged cookie mix so they now know that some times when you make cookies they do not come from the container in the refrigerator. I think they might still be surprised when they see someday in the future that people actually make somethings from scratch. Almost all of my cooking involves cans, boxes or frozen food of some type. My children would truly suffer if I ever had to cook from scratch. Hopefully for them that day never comes. When I meet women or men who actually love to cook and clean I wonder about there sanity. I am sure that it all comes down to genetics or environment or some such. I think that my domestic genes may have been stolen by my brothers.

Thoughts on things you don't say to your wife!

So I don't usually share video but Darin sent it to me and it's pretty funny!
Enjoy! You might need to press stop on the music playlist at the bottom of the page before watching the video.


Things You Don't Say To Your Wife - Free videos are just a click away

Thougts on what I was doing ten years ago...

I don't usually do these list things but this is for you Les...



Ten Years Ago:
1.) I had been married for almost two years. (I had been more than 4 years since me and Darin started dating)
2.) I had started my first official teaching job. I was teaching 3rd grade in Chualar. (That was my most memorable class ever).
3.) Me and Darin were living in studio apartment above a barn (ya that's right).
4.) I was in my second semester at Chapman college.
5.) I was driving a green minni van (with no kids) pretty pathetic. All I can say is it was really cheap.

Today's to do list:
1.) Make it to church - and actually make it to Sac. Mtg.
2.) Sleep
3.) DISHES & LAUNDRY ( they are my personal nemesis). If I end up in hell they are the reason. You know the saying cleanness in next to godliness then right now I am a goner.
4.) Learning Records for work.. AHU I hate Learning Records
5.) Try not to kill any of my offspring.

Places I have lived:
1.) San Francisco, CA ( I never left the hospital but I was there for three months).
2.) Oakland, CA (My grandparents for few months) I was not aloud to go to Mexico until I was six months old because my lungs were to weak (my parents were living in Mexico at the beginning of my moms pregnancy)
3.) Valley de Pueblo, Mexico (a few more months)
4.) Capitola, CA (two months)
5.) Prunedale, CA (18 years)
6.) Santa Cruz, CA (2 years)
7.) Royal Oaks, CA (12 years, we have lived in three places in Royal Oaks)
Royal Oaks is basically Prundale so I have pretty much lived the same place since I turned one.

If I were a millionaire: (Multi Millionaire?)
1.) Pay off my house
2.) Get out of debt
3.) Buy a vacation house in the Netherlands
4.) Get a cabin at the lake
5.) Get a Maid and a Nanny (part time) just for my sanity

Snacks I enjoy: ( I love all Snacks)
1.) Dehydrated Cesar flavor green beans
2.) Dried Mango from costco
3.) Fruit Smoothies
4.) Brussles cookies
5.) Baked Cheddar Onion and Sour Cream Ruffles
(stroop waffles and anything chocolate)

I will try to write something in the next week or so......

Thoughts on Guy Rules

Here are some Rules for guys that Darin sent me afew weeks ago. I though I would share them with my readers:

Now here are the rules from the male side.
These are our rules!
Please note... these are all numbered "1"
ON PURPOSE!

1. Men are NOT mind readers.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon
or the changing of the tides.
Let it be.

1. Shopping is NOT a sport.
And no, we are never going to think of it that way.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a Problem.
See a doctor.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.

1. If you won't dress like the Victoria 's Secret girls,don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
Don't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one

1. You can either ask us to do something
Or tell us how you want it done.
Not both.
If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus didNOT need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched.
We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong.
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine.Really.

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as SEX, CARS, the shotgun formation, or BASKETBALL.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

1. Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;

Thoughts on Remembering Your Loved

We are all loved and hopefully it is not something we ever forget. My blogs entries are not usually overly religious. All though I am some what overly religious. Sometimes it is nice to get a reminder that we are loved. Last Saturday I was having a one of those days were everything seems to hit bottom and you find your self asking why. In the middle of my day the door bell rang and a friend stopped by to drop off my blue tooth and a hug. The hug changed my day and reminded me that I was loved. It reminded me that their were people out their who love me. Some times it is the small things that fall into place at the right time and remind us that we are loved and that someone is watching out for us all.

Thoughts on Literature

OK, so I have found myself with a literary dilemma recently. I have been obsessed with a series of books in which the writing is really not that polished and I can not pin point my obsession. Here is the basic question: What makes a good book?
I am sure the answer is different for everyone. Is it plot, characterization, setting, foreshadowing, literary language, genre or complexity? What is it about a book that makes us think I can not put this down. Does it have to do with being able to dive into another world so fully that the character's seem real that their experiences seem like your experiences. I am not quite sure. In general I love Fantasy, Science Fiction and Historiography. Since I don't have lots of time I like something that pulls me in and is easy to follow. I am doing to much to really enjoy anything overly complicated. I guess this book series does all these things.
So here goes I am going to admit it I am obsessed with the twilight series (and the host). I feel like I am admitting I watched Gossip Girl more than once (auh). It's possible that I could even be categorized as a twi-hard. Really I think I am just obsessed because the last book in the twilight series is coming out in a couple of weeks.
I always get a little obsessed before a new book in a series of books I like comes out (I was checking JK Rowlings web site and reading a bunch of fan fiction before Deathly Hallows came out). And Stephanie Meyers knows how to work the web. Something most authors are missing out on. If you are a fan of the books and have not checked out her site you are missing out http://www.stepheniemeyer.com/index.html. The story Outtakes, Extras, Missing Chapters, Q & A's, Quote of the Day and Book Playlist really take the web site one step beyond most of the author sites I visit (Yes I visit the websites of all my favorite authors!). The first chapter of Midnight Sun on her site is also a must.
I promise I will only let myself obsess over this once. Here are a few of my favorite twilight sites: http://www.twilightlexiconblog.com/?page_id=17 The Twilight lexicon is a must the character bio's and personal correspondence give allot of background information not found in the books. http://www.twilightguy.com/ The twilight guy because Kaleb Nation is freakin hilarious. Stephanie's myspace http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfmfuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=52906350 has some background info (though most of it is also on her website). Twilight mom's is ok, but doesn't really offer anything new or different http://twilightmoms.com/About.php (they have some interviews with the characters in the movie twilight). More tidbits Andy at the Normal Mormon is kinda funny http://mormonhusbands.blogspot.com/2008/02/twilight-series-for-dummies-and-totally.html. My favorite fan fiction is at http://community.livejournal.com/sortofbeautiful/ & favorite writer of fan fiction http://borntobewild13.livejournal.com/tag/fanfiction. I would also check out the main characters myspace pages (each of the main characters have a myspace where they blog).
When I first read the books I liked them. Although I thought it might have to do with the fact that Stephanie Meyers was a LDS, Stay at Home Mom turned Best Seller who just happened to be my age. How could I not be supportive? It seemed like her books were written for an LDS female audience (she was writing for herself and so it was for an LDS audience). I wondered if other people liked them ,but couldn't find anyone that was not LDS who had read them. It seems like her non LDS fans are as obsessed with her as her LDS fans. I think her strength as a writer is capturing human relationships and emotions within non traditional genre setting. She has a way of creating interesting character dynamics within interesting worlds. She needs to work on giving her books more polish. She also is great at crossing genre lines. I love the way that she mixes romance and every day life with fantasy and science fiction. Just in case anyone cares I don't like Edward Cullen! I am a Jacob fan (even though he is not going to get the girl) I also like Ian from the Host (really how could you not). I am hopeful that Meyers can pull off a Rowling-esc ending that makes everyone happy. I thought that there was know way that JK Rowling was going to pull off an ending that people enjoyed for Deathly Hallows, but she did. I am pulling for Stephanie to tie up all her strings in Breaking Dawn. That's enough of my obsessing.

Some say the World will end in Fire.

Thoughts on playing

(I can't believe I have not posted since Mother's day). I find that I post more often when I am trying to procrastinate work. Having the older boys home also gives me less time to write. Everything feels like a chore with all four of the boys home. Doing errands is a complete joke.

I have been worrying recently that I don't do enough fun things with the boys. It feels like I am always asking them to clean or just plain listen. I worry that I am not helping to create enough fun experiences. That we are not making enough memories. I get so caught up in everything that I am trying to get done that I rarely do anything meaningful with the boys. I rarely make the time to play on their level.

I don't really remember my parents playing with me. I remember them reading to me. Talking with me listening to me. I remember them making time for me. Driving me every where. Being a part of my life and letting me be a part of their lives. I remember vacations. I don't know that I remember allot of "play". I played with my brother's all the time. I don't remember playing with my parents.

As a kid I always admired the families that played together. The families that may have had less than my family but made each day their own. Made each day special and unique. Darin plays with the boys. I find it hard to play and create real learning opportunities. This is sort of a stupid thing to worry about. Sometimes I worry that their memories of me as adults will be of a mom who was always nagging always trying to get them to do something.

Being a parent is so much harder than I would have ever guessed.I never thought that being a parent would be an Easy thing. I guess I though that there would be hard moments, hard periods, hard days. I didn't realize that those moments would happen so often. As a teacher it is easy to judge peoples parenting styles and to judge their children's behavior. It sorta comes with the job. But being a parent is much harder than it looks and so much harder than being a teacher. At least for me.

I guess my main concern is that my children will not have strong memories to build on when they have their own families. That they will only hold on to the negative memories and not remember the positive. That I don't spend enough time making memories with them that will last. It probably sounds dumb. It feels like there is so little time in the day and they are growing so fast.

I know that it is just a matter of prioritising my life to take the time to make each day my own. I guess I worry about this in all my relationships. That I don't give enough of myself. That I don't give enough time to make the lasting memories. I know I don't give Darin the time that he deserves.

What do we really remember? What determines what we remember? It is so unique for everyone. Can I control what my children remember? Can I sensor there experiences. I guess it would be very naive to assume that I could. I guess the best I can do is help them to create more meaningful memories. Then hopefully the good will out way the bad. I am doing so much and have myself spread so thin that I worry that if I give more of myself I will fall apart. Crazy Huh!